She’s awaiting my response

Let’s go shopping – again! I’ve just received the following email -

Subject: Re: AWAITING YOUR RESPONSE

URGENT RESPONSE

My name is Jenifer Wilson I am a dying woman who have decided to donate what I have to church. I am 64 years old and I was diagnosed for cancer for about 7 years ago, immediately after the death of my husband who lived all his life in America, who has left me everything he worked for.

I have been touched by God to donate from what I have inherited from my late husband for the good work of God, rather than allow my relatives to use my husband hard earned funds ungodly. Please pray that the good Lord forgive me my sins. I have asked God to forgive me and I believe He has because He is a merciful God. I will be going in for an operation soon. I decided to WILL/donate the sum of $5,500,000 (Five million five hundred thousand dollars) to you for the good work of the lord, and also to help the motherless and less privilege and also for the assistance of the widows according to (JAMES 1:27).

At the moment I cannot take any telephone calls right now due to the fact that my relatives are around me and my health status. I have adjusted my WILL and my lawyer is aware I have changed my will; you and he will arrange the transfer of the funds from my account to you. I wish you all the best and may the good Lord bless you abundantly, and please use the funds well and always extend the good work to others. Contact my lawyer in the Netherlands with this specified email below and his contact:

These is the contact information’s of my lawyer I have already introduced you to him.

NAME: BRIAN VARIS (esq.)
Email: brianvaris@lawyer.com
Contact him as soon as possible.

And tell him that I have WILLED ($5,500,000.00) to you and I have also notified him that I am WILLING that amount to you for a specific and good work. I know I don’t know you but have been directed to do this. Thanks and God bless.

NB: I will appreciate your utmost confidentiality in this matter until the task is accomplished as I don’t want anything that will jeopardize my last wish. And Also I will be contacting with you by email as I don’t want my relation or anybody to know because they are always around me.

Regards,

Jenifer Wilson

The smartest little kid around

I’d forgotten about calvin & hobbes by Bill Watterson. The books are wonderful, and some of the observations and lines that Calvin comes out with are completely priceless (and of course Hobbes is very cute – when he’s a stuffed toy!).

calvin & hobbes.jpg
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.

Some of the quotes are fantastic:

The problem with new experiences is that they’re so rarely the ones you choose.

Life’s a lot more fun when you’re not responsible for your actions.

That’s one of the remarkable things about life. It’s never so bad that it can’t get worse.

I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.

Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character.

There’s an inverse relationship between how good something is for you and how much fun it is.

A good compromise leave everyone mad.

There’s no problem so awful that you can’t add guilt to it and make it even worse.

I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone’s expectations.

And the best of the lot-

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.

And some of the strips are hilarious!

committing suicide.jpg
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.

For the love of an Archaeologist….

I found these poems amongst a load of papers -

The Passionate archaeologist to his love

Come dig with me and be my love,
And we will lots of theories prove;
On hill, in valley, dale and field
We’ll find out what each site will yield.

And we will scrape among the rocks
Where Bronze Age man once fed his flocks;
In Roman cities, by whose walls
Melodious birds now make their calls.

We’ll camp beside an ancient cot
And stick together bits of pot,
Or work beside some murky becks
While freezing rain runs down our necks.

We’ll dig in sun, in sleet and rain
And Neolithic data gain;
In anoraks against the cold
We’ll scratch for flints and dig for gold.

With frozen hands and muddy knees
We’ll trench our way from Thames to Tees;
If you can cook on pressure stove,
Then dig with me and be my love.

And when there’s nothing else to date
In sleeping-bags we’ll love and mate.
If these delights they mind may move,
Then dig with me and be my love.

The Archaeologist’s Lass Replies

What makes you think I’d be your love
And all those doubtful pleasures prove
To dig in sleet while fingers freeze?

And do you think I have the will
To scape away half of Silbury Hill,
Or on a frosty day to sit
In some old Roman refuse pit?

Why ever should I give a jot
For Neolithic sherds of pot,
Or single out with loving care
And mark your bits of Samian ware?

But I confess I’d be content
To share with you your humble tent
And in a sleeping-bag to lie
Watching the racing clouds go by.

Such thoughts, I own, do me console,
I’d even hold your ranging pole:
I’ll cook your meals on pressure stove,
And dig with you and be your love.

Written by Ken Wilson (with apologies to Christopher Marlowe)

Harry arrives

Harry arrives
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.
Colin went off this morning to get some bits from the department, I had to stay at home – although I wasn’t desperate for my Harry Potter book we had decided that it wasn’t fair on the postman to make him carry the damn thing back to the depot if I wasn’t at home to take delivery (there was no way it was going to go through the letterbox).

So when it arrived I was here – he (the postman) seemed very please when I opened the door, he said that he’d already ‘caught’ one of my neighbours sneaking out before taking delivery!

So, I’ve started reading, but I have been doing other things (such as delivering Mum’s fridge and freezer to Brodsworth where they are going to belong to the dig – I’ve bought newish fridge freezer off the people who are selling me the house).

I spoke to Gee – her copy had arrived as well, and she’d already read the last chapter!! She tells me that she does that with all book so that she know which creatures will be there at the end and therefore which are worth concentrating on – she also said that she’d like to do that in life! Imagine when you meet someone knowing straight away if they are worth spending time getting to know!

Anyway, I’m sure that there are many many people across the world who have already read it, but I’m sure it will take me at least a few days yet.

The last installment…

Tonight at midnight the last installment of Harry Potter (by J K Rowling for those of you who have been living in a complete vacuum for the last few years!) comes out.

According to The Guardian one in 43 British homes have pre-ordered the book, and the Royal Mail will deliver around 600,000 copies tomorrow morning (hopefully one to me!). Dad has even got me to order a copy for him!

People (adults and children) will be queuing outside bookshops across the world tonight, and most in the UK will be opening at midnight for a party!

On the Amazon website there is a ‘Muggle counter’, which says that it counts the number of pre-orders across the Amazon companies, as I write this it stands at – 2,235,330 – that totals about £20,095,617!!!! (given they are selling it for £8.99 in the UK).

They also have a leader board of towns across the UK charting pre-orders!

1.	Wallingford, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 1
2.	Ashbourne, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 2
3.	Huntingdon, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 3
4.	Marlborough, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 5
5.	Carnforth, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 4
6.	Okehampton, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 6
7.	Faringdon, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 8
8.	Kingsbridge, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 7
9.	Malmesbury, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 9
10.	Cheadle, England
	Last Week’s Rank: 12

I’d love to know why Wallingford is number one??

Cat

DSC_7033
Originally uploaded by junku.

I don’t usually go in for ‘other peoples’ cats – but Junku’s cats are so so cute (he is the second person I made a contact on Flickr, the first being Alison who invited me), and his photos of them are fantastic.

I love this photo, of Fuwari, is so sweet and makes me think of my cat ‘Pud’.

When Pud died in 1999 (old age – 19+ is a good age) I swore I wouldn’t have another cat – and now I’ve got Tiggy (Mum’s cat) and I’m just as attached to him. Damn them!

Why do I get this?

Do they know something I don’t (you’d think after 35 years I’d have noticed)?

I’ve just received this, and the title was ‘Paris Hilton likes them big’ -

**Endorsed by healthcare professionals**

Start small and finish with a bang, the new male penile enlargement pills is the complete virility.

Formula for men with all the benefits you want, but none of the negatives and you will get astonishingly fast results with the new and improved formula.

So stop wishing you were bigger below your belt, now you can be.

It then goes on with some complete drivel (as if the above isn’t!). Anyway, if any of my friends feel the need for the web address for the above please let me know, and I’ll forward it ;o)

Mr Fishy Fish

Colourful fish
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.

It’s amazing the silly conversations that occur between couples late in the evening! Colin and I got talking about the name ‘Harry Halibut’, I’d been looking at his great photo of an accident on Abbeydale Road.

This set us off thinking of fishy names, this is the list we came up with -

Peter Perch
Penelope Pilchard
Carl Carp
Ronald Rockfish
Simon Salmon
Michael Mackerel
Colin Cod
Sandra Skate
Sebastian Stickleback
Trudie Trout
Megan Monkfish
Penny Pufferfish
Becky Barracuda
Tony Tuna
Loretta Lamprey
Eliza Eel
Percy Piranha
Hermione Haddock
Sonia Sole
Paula Pike
Timothy Tench
Angela Anchovy
Sadie Saeth
Walter Whitebait
Catherine Catfish
Benjamin Bass
Wendy Whiting
Gordon Goldfish
Hannibal Hake
Felicity Flounder
Maureen Mullet
Lionel Loach
Millicent Minnow
Laura Lungfish
Stephen Sting Ray
Manny Manta Ray
Celia Coelecanth
Ruddy Red Snapper
Semolina Seahorse
Sally Sprat
Susy Swordfish
Sharon Shark
Wilberforce Whale
Terry Tadpole
Tommy Toadfish
Herman Herring
Fiona Flying-Fish
Stephanie Sturgeon

Oh dear – are we completely mad??

Rice Crispy Cake

Rice Crispy Cake
Originally uploaded by Ms. Moll.

Ben (next door) made this – yummy chocolate rice crispy cakes. Colin and I supplied the chocolate chips and the paper cups, which means we get to taste the results – yum!

When will we learn?

Prices Go Up
Originally uploaded by figilopes.

I’ve just popped up to the Co-Op for a lettuce, in front of me in the queue a young lad was buying himself a bag of chocolate and a bottle of pop – just those two items, which were to be eaten straightaway.

The woman at the check out automatically, without thinking, put them both in a bag and handed it to him.

My turn – and she actually went to put my single lettuce in a plastic bag!! I obviously declined.

As I walked back to the car there was the young boy eating his chocolate and drinking his pop – at least he put the bag in the litter bin – but it wasn’t even used for more than 2 minutes. WHAT A WASTE!!

What the hell is the world coming to – this is totally ridiculous! I’m really mad about this – ggggggrrrrrrrrhhhhhhh!

We use on average 167 a year
Only one in every 200 bags is recycled
Plastics can take up to 400 years to break down in a landfill

DON’T USE PLASTIC CARRIER BAGS – use a cloth bag (if you ask me nicely I’ll send you one!)